Discordian Date

#! /usr/local/bin/node

// <xbar.title>Discordian Date</xbar.title>
// <xbar.version>v1.0</xbar.version>
// <xbar.author>Volker Wieban</xbar.author>
// <xbar.author.github>hpcodecraft</xbar.author.github>
// <xbar.desc>Shows the current date of the Discordian calendar</xbar.desc>
// <xbar.image>https://user-images.githubusercontent.com/1476865/69000513-2dee4b00-08d1-11ea-9d23-c4c5aaa8d815.png</xbar.image>
// <xbar.dependencies>bash,node</xbar.dependencies>

// SETUP
// You need to have node installed for this to work
// On Mac OS with Homebrew, `brew install node` will set you up

// JS port of ddate
// Copypasta'ed from:
// https://github.com/ishmayeck/node-ddate/blob/master/ddate.js

const days = [
  { l: "Sweetmorn", s: "SM" },
  { l: "Boomtime", s: "BT" },
  { l: "Pungenday", s: "PD" },
  { l: "Prickle-Prickle", s: "PP" },
  { l: "Setting Orange", s: "SO" }
];

const seasons = [
  { l: "Chaos", s: "Chs" },
  { l: "Discord", s: "Dsc" },
  { l: "Confusion", s: "Cfn" },
  { l: "Bureaucracy", s: "Bcy" },
  { l: "The Aftermath", s: "Afm" }
];

const holydays = {
  Chaos: {
    5: "Mungday",
    50: "Chaoflux"
  },
  Discord: {
    5: "Mojoday",
    50: "Discoflux"
  },
  Confusion: {
    5: "Syaday",
    50: "Confuflux"
  },
  Bureaucracy: {
    5: "Zaraday",
    50: "Bureflux"
  },
  "The Aftermath": {
    5: "Maladay",
    50: "Afflux"
  }
};

const minute = 1000 * 60;
const day = minute * 60 * 24;
const year = day * 365;

const DDate = function(epooch) {
  /* for reference, epoch is Sweetmorn, 1 Chaos 3136 */
  this.date = {};

  this.initificate = function(epooch) {
    epooch -= new Date().getTimezoneOffset() * minute;
    const leps = Math.floor(epooch / year / 4);
    epooch -= leps * day;

    let cur = Math.floor((epooch % year) / day);
    const flarf = Math.floor(epooch / (day * 365)) + 3136;
    const ist = (flarf - 3130) % 4 == 0;
    this.tabby = ist && cur == 59;
    if (ist && cur > 59) cur -= 1;

    const gwar = Math.floor(cur % 73) + 1;
    const sn = Math.floor(cur / 73);
    let woody = 0;
    for (let i = 1; i <= cur; i++) {
      woody = woody == 4 ? 0 : woody + 1;
    }
    const hoyl = holydays[seasons[sn].l][gwar] || false;
    this.numricks = [woody, sn, gwar, flarf, hoyl];
    if (this.tabby) return { tibs: true, year: flarf };
    return {
      tibs: false,
      day: days[woody],
      season: seasons[sn],
      date: gwar,
      year: flarf,
      holyday: hoyl
    };
  };

  this.numberize = function(num) {
    const thtaghn = num % 100 > 9 && num % 100 < 15;
    switch (num % 10) {
      case 1:
        return num + (thtaghn ? "th" : "st");
      case 2:
        return num + (thtaghn ? "th" : "nd");
      case 3:
        return num + (thtaghn ? "th" : "rd");
      case 4:
      default:
        return num + "th";
    }
  };

  this.toOldImmediateDateFormat = function() {
    return (
      this.date.day.l +
      ", the " +
      this.numberize(this.date.date) +
      " day of " +
      this.date.season.l +
      " in the YOLD " +
      this.date.year
    );
  };

  this.toDateString = function() {
    return this.format("%{%A, %B %e%}, %Y YOLD");
  };

  this.getDate = function() {
    return this.date;
  };

  this.format = function(str) {
    if (!str) return;
    let r = "";
    let stopit = false;
    let tibsing = false;
    for (let i = 0; i < str.length; i++) {
      if (stopit) break;
      if (str[i] == "%" && str[i + 1] == "}") tibsing = (i += 2) == Infinity;
      if (tibsing) continue;
      if (str[i] == "%") {
        switch (str[i + 1]) {
          case "A":
            r += days[this.numricks[0]].l;
            break;
          case "a":
            r += days[this.numricks[0]].s;
            break;
          case "B":
            r += seasons[this.numricks[1]].l;
            break;
          case "b":
            r += seasons[this.numricks[1]].s;
            break;
          case "d":
            r += this.numricks[2];
            break;
          case "e":
            r += this.numberize(this.numricks[2]);
            break;
          case "H":
            r += this.numricks[4] || "";
            break;
          case "N":
            stopit = !Boolean(this.numricks[4]);
            break;
          case "n":
            r += "\n";
            break;
          case "t":
            r += "\t";
            break;
          case "{":
            // if(this.tabby) tibsing = ((r += "St. Tib's Day") != Infinity);
            if (this.tabby) tibsing = (r += "") != Infinity;
            break;
          case ".":
            r += "I've nothing to say to you. (yet)";
            break;
          case "Y":
            r += this.numricks[3];
            break;
          default:
            r += str[i];
            break;
        }
        i++;
      } else {
        r += str[i];
      }
    }
    return r;
  };

  this.date = this.initificate(epooch || new Date().getTime());
};

// ----------------------------------------
// Bitbar script
// ----------------------------------------

const color = "goldenrod";
const specialDayColor = "seagreen";

// Current date/time
const d = new Date();

// DDate format
const shortDate = "%a, %b %e";
const longDate = `%A|color=${color}%nThe %e day of %B|color=${color}%nIn %Y Year of Our Lady of Discord|color=${color}%n`;

// Display Special Day
let specialDay = false;
const dd = new DDate();
const ddProps = dd.getDate();

if (ddProps.tibs) {
  specialDay = "St. Tib's Day";
} else if (ddProps.holyday) {
  specialDay = ddProps.holyday;
} else if (d.getDay() === 5) {
  specialDay = "Hot Dog Day";
}

const output =
  dd.format(shortDate) +
  `|dropdown=false color=${color}\n` +
  "---\n" +
  dd.format(longDate) +
  (specialDay ? "\nIt's " + specialDay + `!|color=${specialDayColor}` : "");

console.log(output);